Progress

I got to play the piano today.

Profound, huh?

One of my friends has been hosting Vacation Bible School in her house for our mom's group kids. I got the super fun job of leading music. I loved it!!!!! Leading music at VBS is something that I did every summer for about 10+ years ~ sometimes more than once a summer. I always loved watching the songs become a part of the kids. They don't care if you're on key (although I did give my best effort at that), they don't care if you're hair is falling down (although I did try and keep it out of my face). They only care about having fun and the absolute JOY that comes from singing and dancing.

Since today was the last day, we took a "field trip". We went to visit a "memory support group" at a local retirement village. We took flower vases to the members and the kids got to sing some songs for them. They were freaking rock stars!!! I was sooo proud of them ~ they sang with huge smiles on their faces and brought so many smiles to the members of the group. It was awesome to hear them sing about Jesus and show the love to others that we've been talking about all week. Better yet, my 5 year old daughter was in that singing group. It's one thing to pour your heart into children and watch the light come on. It's so different when it's your own. She still makes my heart smile thinking about it :)

So, back to the piano. As I've been leading music this week, a piano has been directly behind me the entire time. It was calling me :) I grew up with one in my house. I took lessons. I played at church - a lot. I've played for weddings and other various events. But, I have to admit, I think I'm a bit rusty... That happens doesn't it? I haven't actively played for several years. I don't have a piano at home and it's hard to find one to just "visit".

But, there's this song I wrote. Man, do I love it! It just came to me one day several years ago. It doesn't have a title. It doesn't have words. But, it makes me happy because it's pretty and it came from deep in my heart.

The last time I passed a piano at which I could linger was about a year ago. As is my custom, I started to play "my song". I like to do this periodically just to prove I still "have it". :) lol. The problem was, I faltered halfway through the song and couldn't regain the correct progression. I forgot "my song". Man, did that suck...

I kind of feel like that in a lot of areas. Like I've lost the "progression". I hear myself say "I used to do this, or I used to do that"... Some of those I'm ok to leave in the past. Many I'm not. It's hard to merge the life I lived ten years ago with the one I live now. In so many ways, my life is fuller ~ thanks to my husband and kids. But, I want to find some of those lost progressions. Those things that make me uniquely me. The parts of my heart and soul that aren't defined by the titles of wife or mom.

I think we're getting there.

Today, I played my song.