New Discoveries

I love when I learn something new!

I love it even more when it makes my life easier :)

I learned today that Hydrogen Peroxide is magic. Pure magic in a brown bottle.

When we bought our house, it was carpeted in beige. It still is. Well, beige + extras. We have two kids people ~ one 5 and one 8. Things get spilled. A lot.

Listen to me ~ blaming the kids ;). Truth be told I spill just as much as them.

I try to clean it up. I really do. But, there is usually something left behind to remind me.

Then, last night our dog got sick off of cheap, generic dog treats. The kind of sick that doesn't need details or you may not read my blog again. But, let's just say that our marginal carpet was suddenly horrible. It was with Herculean self-control that I didn't just rip up the entire mess of carpet before hubby got home from work.

Then I remembered a friend told me about a hydrogen peroxide mixture for spot cleaning. I looked it up and there it was! But, even better, I found out that you can use straight peroxide for those "tougher, hard to treat stains". I looked around ~ yep, it fit that bill! The warning (which I share with you so you don't blast me with complaints) was to test it and make sure it didn't discolor your carpet. Again, I looked around and thought "couldn't get discolored worse than it already is". So, I got out a spray bottle and just dumped a bunch of peroxide in (from the $1.00 HUGE bottle in my medicine cabinet) and had a spray party.

Guess what???

It worked!!! Amazingly well. I couldn't believe it!! Neither could hubby when he got home from work. And it cost me pennies compared to commercial cleaners and worked in a fraction of the time with hardly any effort!

I'm so excited to have a new trick up my sleeve. Now for the energy to do the remainder of the floors!

I'm only sad it came from our sweet dog  being under the weather :(

So, let's recap ~ $1.00 for horrible dog treats or $1.00 for multipurpose hydrogen peroxide....

Pretty sure I know which belongs in the garbage and which belongs in my house!

What uses have you found for this magic household staple?

Sometimes you need a bucket dumped on your head!

It's hot here. Really hot.

So, where do you go when it's hot?

For us, the answer is "To the water". So, today we visited one of the local splash parks.

I knew it would be a good day when we arrived because I found a place to park our stuff in the shade of a gigantic tree right next to the water action. The day got even better when I remembered I had the beach toys in the car ~ beach toys that included BUCKETS!

Every other time we've gone to a splash park, my kids are begging to dump out the bottled water so they have SOMETHING to collect the water. Today was different. I had buckets. Big, sandcastle buckets.

Today I was the cool hero mom.

And, how did they repay the hero?

By dumping bucket after bucket of water over my head.

They started tentatively, as if they wondered if this would really be as great as they imagined. My unbridled laughter and joy were all the motivation they needed. I have no idea how many buckets they poured over me. All I know is that somewhere after the third water dump, I felt the tension and stress from the last few days wash away.

And, all I saw on my kid's faces was sheer joy.

In this shot I caught our youngest mid shower from stretching his swim shirt over the spray of the toy structure.

I loved this day :)

I am learning....

Here I am ~ it is summer. Mid summer actually! Where does the time go anyway? 

I am deep in planning mode for the upcoming school year. I spent about 4 months feeling my wheels spin over next school year. Whether or not we would continue to homeschool was not in question. What WAS in question is what exactly we would study and HOW it would look. 

I researched. I talked to people. I researched some more. I talked to people ~ again. I finally sat down a few days ago to start ordering materials. And then I went cold.

Suddenly nothing seemed right. I thought I had made up my mind. But, there was no peace. And, I couldn't for the life of me figure what was causing the unease.

Wait, did you catch that? ~ I thought I had made up MY mind.

Like I'm the director of this life we lead.

I'm reminded of the story in Matthew 7 of the wise and foolish men who built their houses on rock and sand. In this story, Jesus is explaining that people who hear His words and put them into practice are like the man who builds his house on a rock. When the rains come, the house stands strong. This stands in contrast to a man who would build his house on the sand. When rain comes, the sand is washed away and so is his house! 

I think I've always subconsciously thought the man who built his house on the sand was either lazy or stupid. It never occurred to me that these men could have both been hard workers or good builders. It takes a lot of work and skill to build a house. Blood, sweat and tears. It never says these men were lazy.And, it also doesn't say one was smart and the other stupid. It says one made a wise choice and the other made a foolish choice as to where they built their house. 

I can imagine the one who built his house on the sand walking around and saying "Hey, this looks like a nice spot for a house. Beautiful view. Soft yard. I can see my ship from here" and set to work building. I imagine he worked hard and probably had a beautiful house But here's the thing ~ he started on the wrong foundation.

Kind of like me. I am more like that man than I would care to admit. I set about doing what I think is best and most effective. I try and make our school "just so". I want it to run smoothly. I want our kids to have "enough" (whatever that is). I want to be set up for success.

But, I forget to stop and find our Rock. I forget to make sure the foundation is secure before I set to work.

Three days ago I remembered that I forgot. And I went back to the drawing board.

I prayed. I asked the One who loves us all more than life what was the best course for our school. I asked Him to show me what was best for each of my kids.

Then something crazy happened.

The spinning stopped. 

He led me back to big picture of goals for the year for each child. His goals.

And, once we had goals, we could make a plan.

Everyone knows that storms will come ~ regardless of your spot in life. It is inevitable. As a homeschool family, sometimes those storms come to our school. I have weathered many stormy days. But, I am realizing something. When I feel I am being washed under the bridge by the storm, maybe I was building on myself  instead of Someone stronger than me.

I pray I remember this the next time it rains. 

Am I really a blogger?

I am wondering this these days... Am I really a blogger?

I LOVE to read blogs. Every morning I open Google reader on my Kindle and scan the blogs that I follow. Then, during my mid-day breaks I scan them again. And, before bed I do it once again. So, apparently I like to read them.

But, it's hard to find time to write.

I think it's because I want to have a post that is "just so". That is SO like me. If I can't do something PERFECTLY I tend to run away from it and just not do it at all. It is hard for me to realize that small steps, even seemingly insignificant ones, contribute to an overall success.

Right now I'm in this stage with lots of areas of my life. Afraid I'm not succeeding because I see little change ~ or I should say little change in the measures I'm used to. So, I'm learning to shift my focus.

When I have a rough day with the kids school, it doesn't mean we are failing. It just means some days are hard and we try again tomorrow. Until the day I look back and can't believe what my kids have learned.

When I feel like my house might overtake me because it's a mess it doesn't mean I'm sloppy. It means I chose to spend time playing with my kids instead of cleaning like a maniac. And, then I do the dishes (again!) and sweep the floor (again) and somehow it's enough for now.

And, when I feel like there is no progress from these health changes I'm making it doesn't mean I'm not changing. Change is S.L.O.W. both the good ones and the bad ones. So, I keep choosing to exercise. I keep choosing to eat (mostly) real food. And I keep choosing to focus on one choice at a time and do the "next right thing".

So, I am accepting that not every post in this blog needs to be perfectly inspiring. And that is ok. It's the sum of the parts that make the whole.

Now, I have to go to Body Pump. It's the "next right thing" on my list today :)

Healing

"This is where the healing begins, oh
This is where the healing starts
When you come to where you're broken within
The light meets the dark
The light meets the dark"

           ~Tenth Avenue North

Last night at the gym, this song came up on my playlist. I almost skipped it. The cadence was too slow to match my elliptical steps. But, I love this song so I let it play.

I'm glad I did.

This song speaks to me on many levels ~ emotional, spiritual, and mental. But last night I realized something. Getting into physical shape is also a process of healing. I am still fleshing out what that really means but I see progress in small increments as I go.

My body is sick. I've neglected it. I've abused it. I've put the wrong things into it and expected perfection to come out. Insanity.

But, slowly it is healing.

I don't crave sugar as much as before.

I'm sleeping deeply and peacefully.

I am satisfied with MUCH less food.

After a workout I don't hurt quite as much.

I go back to the gym. Again. And again.

I have been pushing my body past the point of ease ~ breaking down those walls if you will. I am not obsessing, I am just working hard. And it feels good.

The outward change hasn't begun (at least as far as I can tell) so I have to remind myself of these smaller steps of healing. And the joy that comes from losing some of the chains that have held me for far too long.

Here is the song in its entirety. If you have something that has held you (or you hold onto and can't let go), let these words sink in... Let the healing begin.

"Healing Begins"
So you thought you had to keep this up
All the work that you do
So we think that you're good
And you can't believe it's not enough
All the walls you built up
Are just glass on the outside

So let 'em fall down
There's freedom waiting in the sound
When you let your walls fall to the ground
We're here now

This is where the healing begins, oh
This is where the healing starts
When you come to where you're broken within
The light meets the dark
The light meets the dark

Afraid to let your secrets out
Everything that you hide
Can come crashing through the door now
But too scared to face all your fear
So you hide but you find
That the shame won't disappear

So let it fall down
There's freedom waiting in the sound
When you let your walls fall to the ground
We're here now
We're here now, oh

This is where the healing begins, oh
This is where the healing starts
When you come to where you're broken within
The light meets the dark
The light meets the dark

Sparks will fly as grace collides
With the dark inside of us
So please don't fight
This coming light
Let this blood come cover us
His blood can cover us

This is where the healing begins, oh
This is where the healing starts
When you come to where you're broken within
The light meets the dark
The light meets the dark 

~Tenth Avenue North

Well, I looked and it's been since 2010 when I used this blog. For someone who loves to write, that is sad.

Pathetic actually.

But, I'm baaacccckkkkkk :-)

I am still on the journey. I titled the blog "On the Journey" because I've learned that life affords us different journeys during different seasons. I wanted the freedom to explore whatever journey was in front of me at the time.

For the last year, I have been on a journey to simplify my life and my schedule. I try to do too much. I always have. I try to please too many people. I used to try to please people out of insecurity. These days I try to please them because I deeply, genuinely care for others. But, in doing so I have often neglected those people and things that deserve and demand the best of me. I have neglected quality time with my kids, quality time with my spouse, and most glaringly quality time taking care of myself.

While working to simplify, God took me to a place of acceptance of how He made me and why I have some of the struggles I do ~ namely, my physical body. I learned that the scale is just an inanimate number that is simply a reflection of my choices. It isn't a definer of my worth as an individual. I also learned that God gave me a body that accurately reflects my choices. I used to get angry at the people I saw who could eat all sorts of crap and still look amazing and wonder "why can't I do that". But God, in His great love for me, knew that this supreme struggle of my life was about what I chose to fill my emptiness and frustration and longing with. And He knew that only by making my body as one that reflected outwardly the inward choices I made, would I ever seek freedom and healing from HIM alone.

I achieved a fit body once. I worked by behind off to get it. I counted points, counted exercise, spent countless hours researching the newest "healthy eating" options, preached, lauded, became arrogant and showy, and took every single ounce of the glory of that accomplishment.

But, here's the thing about thinking you do it all alone. You do. And, when the first rocky patch comes along, having learned to trust and depend solely on yourself finds you, ironically, alone. And, when you are alone, you are vulnerable. And that, my friends, is how I gained back every ounce I worked so long to lose and lived in paranoia of coming back.

And, that is why I'm not going it alone this time.

First and foremost, I have the support and grace of the ONE who is most important to me. "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" (Phil 4:13). I am learning, day by day, that the source of all I do is greater than myself. This time, I want to please HIM. I want to know that I am honoring this body He gave to me. That I am treating it with the respect it deserves. That I am being faithful and not taking it for granted.

I also know I have the support of my family and friends. You know who you are. I love you. You may appear on the pages of this blog. Forgive me in advance :)

And, I'm reaching into the bloggesphere with minimal expectations other than a place to park all the thoughts and feelings as I go. There is a supreme connection for me between writing and clarity. Between writing and action.

So, if you choose to journey with me, thank you. I hope we can encourage each other.

"Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor; if either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken" Ecc 4: 9-12

Thanks for being part of my cord.